love. soul. contentment  
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When I was little I loved playing games. I played games with my friends, parents and family. Every lesson was interrupted by playing in the school playground. I notice my children were the same. Put them together with similar aged children and they invent a game. For a game to work it has some rules and a way of measuring whether we are succeeding or failing. We can get very excited if we think the rules have been broken and feel good when we are winning. Loosing can be hard but if we stay in the game we can turn our fortunes around.

I wonder if we ever stop. Do we stay in our game playing role through to adulthood? Is it simply that the game changes? Do we go from the playground, to education, to work, to life taking different versions of the game with us? As long as we are living by some kind of rules, in competition with others and feeling like we are winning or losing then perhaps we are still playing games. Looking back my games included riding motorcycles fast, social status, money, girlfriends and later being a new age teacher and practitioner. Perhaps there are elements of my current life that hold me in some kind of game.

Whilst playing games can be fun they can also hold us in a lifestyle that we might have outgrown. I am aware that during my more obvious game playing times I would reach a point where I realised I was playing a game I was no longer interested in. The game had distracted me from other possibilities in life.

Stepping out from the game playing has allowed me to focus more on a life that feels right to me, without, I hope getting into a new game with them. I feel I can be more authentic and honest with myself and lead the life I came here for.

Awareness is the start of change for me. It is through being aware of my inclination to make life a game that I can best realise when I am doing it. This awareness gives me the choice of whether to stay in the game or not. The times I feel connected, aware, authentic and honest feel like a better place for me to be than part of a game.

Copyright Simon Brown, London, 2009